300th Post Nihilism

This is my 300th post. The Tea Cerebration(s) has completed 300 posts in 394 days, after its beginning in July 2014. My last 200 posts were done in 194 days. I have done the last 100 posts in 95 days and the last 50 in 46. I did post a minimum of one post on every day. By doing these, I have once again proved that I have no other job. May be I should have another job, but unfortunately, I have none. In the next two hundred days, I will reach the 500 posts marks, if life keeps going this way. Well, there is not really any point about life.

I keep wondering where do I reach with my blogs. Sometimes I think why I should write here. It keeps going on and on, and nothing really happens that would bring a clear change to my life. Each and every day, I write about something or the other, and then I post it, and then nothing else happens. I just go to sleep, and then I wake up and I write. It seems to me more like a loop which goes on eternally. Well, people do many things which seem to be constructive and good for their future. I wonder where does blogging stand.

Doing good with blogging has very less effect on my daily life. I remain the random jobless, useless person as I have always been. The India Today Conclave Win came up as a small relief, but the situation still remains the same. Sometimes, I feel that the particular post came from a part of my brain which I know very less about. The fifth month has arrived after that positive thing, and I am sure that most people have forgotten about that. My life remains empty and I believe that worst things are waiting to happen without giving any slight chance of an escape.

Sometimes, I think whether it does anything which counts at all? 300 posts here and 200 posts at Movies of Soul later, with the extra on other two blogs making more than a 100, thus making it above 600 posts in total, I still remain the person I used to be when someone looks at me. Is it doing good or bad for me? I wonder how it will define my future. Can something really positive come out of this or will this go as how I wasted my life? Will it even make sense to most of the people, the majority of the world?

I have never thought that I would ever reach the number three hundred in my life time. I was completely out of ideas when I started my blogs. Now I do have more ideas, but not sure if it is really a positive thing. I have been just writing and writing without caring about anything else. But I have still reached nowhere even after trying regularly. I am still stuck at the abyss from which only depths call, and not a soul to return to the surface.

I wonder if many of you have read my previous post, Time Machine’s Child, which has been a reflection of my world. It has been recently selected as a WOW post at BlogAdda, and I have been wondering about the same situation. Is the search for a better timeline, or a deviation into a better reality just an illusion? Is there light at the end of the tunnel or is it just a fake belief just to make us explore more of a tunnel which is infinite, and ends for each person only with death?

Will the search for a better alternative end up in the worst situation? Or is that alternative waiting for us after death? Isn’t it easier to have trust in after-life than the present one? There is no justice in this world, and shouldn’t that make the idea of after-life more exciting than the present one? May be if death is the entrance to that better life as religions talk about it, embracing it before being a bigger sinner to ruin it is the better option, right? And if there is no after-life at all, still isn’t it better to finish it off now than later?

***The images used in blog post were taken on my Sony Cybershot Camera.

TeNy

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Through the Sands of Time

Every now and then, what has come between my heart and my mind has been a few great judgments. Some people, both men and women have the notion that men can do whatever they want and they are not judged. But it is a third-rate judgment in itself. We are all chosen to do what the society tells us to. There is nothing that I hate more than the generalization, and it is a disgusting attack on a person’s individuality – this statement itself is a judgment.

I have been a Literature student, and have read something from Jean-Jacques Rousseau’s The Social Contract: “Man is born free, and everywhere he is in chains“. It is not in my power to say who is in chains of stainless steel and who is in the chain of rusting iron, because the situation is not the same everywhere. But one thing I am sure about is that I have been judged throughout my life, and I have seen the same as a perfect example of why the bloody judgment about being judged is not limited to a gender.

In a grand universe in which the man is so minute, society makes a mockery of him.

This calls for a flashback, and the sands of time has been reset to that period when I was going to do my thesis for MA English. I have already written about the seasons of judgment when I decided to halt my BCA and also when I started pursuing English Literature. Here is another one, as the season of judgment has been something like an eternal, hot summer. The strength of the same has never ceased to amaze me.

I have a pretty good list of judges, and there was one who came home and asked me about the thesis I was doing. It was his right to ask about the same because he hadn’t read English or any literature for such a long time. I told him that I was doing something on vampire and related culture based on a number of Gothic horror works which featured vampires, and was using some traditional beliefs to support the same.

Despite not scoring the top marks, this thesis is a bonus to my individuality.

Actually, there was absolutely no need to explain it in detail, and things got kind of worse. The doubt was like why would somebody do a thesis on vampires which are like the demons which are evil? I was surprised that there were too many people asking the same question after that. I had the extreme privilege of being not the good person that I was supposed to be, and that came out of nowhere.

With all my lecturers at college providing full support, didn’t I have the right to do thesis on whatever topic I wanted? How is it that a part of my studies determine if I was good or evil? I have had the free advice to change the topic and do something on Bard of Avon or my namesake who had enough works for a big project, and that was normal. May be if the focus was at least not on the blood-sucking, it was still better.

But I had enough of this nonsense, and I had changed too many things in my life for others. So, I decided to stay judged for this one; I had to be judged for working with blood-suckers rather than a huge tree which stood alone in the middle of a beautiful meadow or a lovely maiden who waited for her lover, and there was always the dumb fiction. The mind still said that this one won’t fetch me a high score as it was about “the vampire”, but heart told me to go on.

I didn’t score that high in the end, and the right decision was indeed to change this topic which the normal people never liked. But I didn’t want the right decision, because I wanted to be judged for making the choice. This judgment was to be my personal bliss. I finally got that, and was never happier, because I was extremely good at what I did, and despite some people not liking it, I enjoyed every bit of reading about the vampires. This is where I followed my heart, and I had chosen not to score high marks, because I study to know; I do this with all my heart to read more and more – this was a true dil ki deal! I felt good, and I felt like a vampire who inherited a lovely castle from Count Dracula.

“I am participating in the #DilKiDealOnSnapdealactivity at BlogAdda in association with SnapDeal.”

***The two photos used in this blog post were taken on my Sony Cybershot DSC-W310 camera.

TeNy

The Wheel of Time

[The following is an excerpt from an unreal conversation at the non-existent Raven Vampire Training Centre and Museum]

Vampire Bat :: Do not touch the Wheel of Time, vampire apprentice.

Vampire Crocodile :: But I thought it was a Playstation Steering Wheel.

Vampire Bat :: Dude, this is a valuable vampire artifact. Uncle Dracula used it to travel through time to bite people.

Vampire Crocodile :: You mean it is a time machine? How does it work? So Uncle Dracula is still biting people?

Vampire Bat :: Uncle Dracula causes a butterfly effect on the space–time continuum that results in the creation of multiple alternate timelines which can only be altered by changing the source code as it is often the quintessence of the human soul, and the true effect of the same is often a bite which is rather lost with its duplication, but the result often shows in the long run.

Vampire Crocodile :: What does that mean?

Vampire Bat :: It means that I am watching too many science fiction movies. Can you just go and drink some blood instead of eating my brain? Zombies eat brains, not us. You should just attend more study classes.

[Gets a cup of Blood Shake].

You can’t escape the sands of time (Pic from PoP Movie official page)

There is that story of friendship that comes out of it, for there are two; science fiction and time travel – they have been friends forever. Even as I was first introduced into the same by H.G. Wells’ The Time Machine, it was carried on by a few movies, and also a few video games which used such a concept. Well, even that save game option that we used in most of the computer games was also the same, because life rarely gives us a second chance otherwise. It had such significance in TimeShift which had stopping, slowing and even reversing time, one of them about which we were familiar with from the Prince of Persia franchise, and the adapted movie too; you can’t really miss out the Sands of Time, can you?

On the big screen, there is that 2002 version of H.G. Wells’ novel, the loose adaptation which was The Time Machine – it teaches about acceptance, that there are things that cannot be changed, even with such a grand possession such as a time machine, even as Back to the Future and its sequels had come up with the idea that it was easier to change the same as far as there is nothing done that is really stupid; and there is always the chance to do things some other way. It was also a really entertaining movie, and it also came up with its own versions. All of them surely needed those machines.

But a few others needed no machine. X-Men: Days of the Future Past does change the world a lot though, as things just get awesome for mutants and the planet. The Terminator did do that a number of times, three to be exact, defining the lives of humans as well as machines. Then there is Looper and Timeline, both following different paths. The Butterfly Effect had our protagonist going back in time to possess his former self for a very short period of time. Whenever he attempted to go back in time and set things right, they all misfired, and lead to those consequences which were even worse than how he wanted them to be.

It is the 2009 movie The Time Traveler‘s Wife that takes the situation to another level as the protagonist struggles with his powers which needs no machine or mutation. There is always the coming back in time to meet anoter onself. Our time travel adventures has now paused at About Time, which has its protagonist going back in time to set things right, but later realizing that he could live without it, and actually he doesn’t really change much with the going back to the past. Both the movies got Rachel McAdams as the beautiful leading lady, as Clare and Mary.

Live in the moment, so says About Time (From About Time official page)

All these movies tell one single story, abut the human desire to go back in time as set things right. All of us wishes to go back in time and change a few things which we should have done in a different manner, and we ends up believing that a different approach or act would have changed our lives for the good. There are too many things we did and said for which we repent, and from this part and our own deeds, there is no escape as it will continue to haunt us through time.

But then there is the question, the uncertainty if the same thing could have given us a better present, and the doubt should be there if our lives can be any better than it is now. The past haunts us, and may be it is time that we realize that it has no hope for us, and as the present lives with us and the future calls, may be the realization that there is no time machine or superpowers will help us more to face it rather than the realization that there are things that can’t be changed.

TeNy