Vampire Alligator: I am actually very surprised that we haven’t found the Vampire Owl for quite some time. He was there for the Mad Max: Fury Road review with you, but haven’t seen him after that. I was wondering about his absence and so were the rest of the members of the Vampire Team. Vampire Crocodile even came to the conclusion that he was dead. Did he contact you or Uncle Dracula?
Vampire Bat: Yes, it is a long story, rather too long to write down as one blog post.
Vampire Alligator: Okay, just remove those parts where you talk about those philosophical things and come up with the rest. It will be so short then, and you can even add a few other things to exaggerate the tale.
Vampire Bat: There is this one-sided love story between the Vampire Owl and Lady Death.
Vampire Alligator: One side? Like Lady Death loved him and he didn’t want to die?
Vampire Bat: No, its the other way around. He was looking for Lady Death. He was even digging the graveyard to find a shortcut to reach her.
Vampire Alligator: Oh, yes. I even heard that rumour that you were searching for Lady Death’s evil twin sister.
Vampire Bat: That is rather different. She is educated outside the realms of death, and won’t inherit the realm. Even in the absence of a husband or an heir, it will only pass on to her prodigal brother who has recently returned from the world tour. It means that she will be free.
Vampire Alligator: Still you don’t know her name yet. Oh forget that! Tell more about the missing Vampire Owl instead.
Vampire Bat: You can call a rose by any name, my dear apprentice. So better you forget that part. About the Vampire Owl, my secret sources say that he finally met Lady Death at the bottom of the Bottomless Sea.
Vampire Alligator: How can he go to the bottom of a sea which has no bottom?
Vampire Bat: That is just the name. You know that we vampires always hated sea. Every sea actually has a bottom except when there is a portal open there, but we will know about that if such an incident occurs.
Vampire Alligator: So, he met her and is ruling the Realm of Death with Lady Death?
Vampire Bat: No, according to the Dark Elf News Channel, he fainted when he got the smell of death from Lady Death, and is now at the Great Elf Mountains Healthcare Centre – they say that he is not ready to leave even after they have discharged him and offered free treatment for one full vampire year.
Vampire Alligator: Is the odour problem that bad? I thought that the vampire situation was rather better.
Vampire Bat: Yes, people have all kinds of perfumes and scents these days, and so everyone is expecting the other person to smell better. It is more like a necessity these days. This is why there is no more official vampire smell.
Vampire Alligator: So Uncle Dracula doesn’t smell like a vampire?
Vampire Bat: Absolutely not. These days, everyone wants to smell better, and they use the best of perfumes even if they are just going to sleep after taking a shower. It just comes naturally to them as part of their daily routine. Everyone takes care of the smell. Even the first impressions are made from the sense of smell. It doesn’t matter how good you are if you smell unpleasant, as the society these days tend to go towards better smelling people.
Vampire Alligator: What about those people who smell terrible from the soul?
Vampire Bat: Yes, such people are there too. They smell terrible inside and pretend to be fair – along with all these getting better, there is no solution to those people who are terrible at heart. But we can work with what we can manage, and smell is something that we can make better.
Vampire Alligator: Evil always finds one way or the other. Let’s at least hope to make the smell feel better.
Vampire Bat: That is the point. Let’s hope that at least the smell gets better if not the minds of men.
Vampire Alligator: Let’s take this further when the Vampire Owl returns to us whenever he decides to.
Vampire Bat: Yes, people need to know!
Vampire Alligator: I am actually going to put this on Facebook and Twitter!
*Just a short story explaining the disappearance of the Vampire Owl even though I was not short-listed for a particular activity 😀
***The images used in this blog post are from the Official Facebook Page of Hotel Transylvania.