The Special Valentine’s Guide

1. Create hell and play with fire: There are some nice and interesting things to do on Valentine’s Day in order to celebrate it, and I would like to start with the creation of hell and maintaining its charming fire. There are a few people whom you can consult on this, and I will mention the name of one such person in the next few paragraph – his name starts with “M” and ends with “S”; that will be all related to the clue. Please don’t be late to create hellfire because not that much of the same will be available on Earth – there will be other lovers in need for the same, and so get it soon – don’t let it go!

2. Watch My Bloody Valentine 3D and if possible, other slasher movies too: The 2009 movie was a remake of the 1981 Canadian slasher flick of the same name, and as the Valentine’s Day should have a movie which has nice happenings on that particular day, this movie will really help. Well, what better than a slasher movie on a Valentine’s Day? Leave the romantic movies behind as they are exaggerated; instead choose this one which is closer to reality – days like February the fourteenth deserves movies like these with all the blood and dead people. This movie in 3D would actually be even better for the day.

mybloody

3. Play Unreal Tournament or Quake 3 Arena: What can be better than shooting him or her on the head with a headshot? Yes, these two games make sure that you can do just that. Take a two player game and murder each other at will, only to come back to life and kill again. A classic deathmatch, the every-man-for-himself player vs player battle will make sure that this Valentine’s Day is a beautiful one. Maybe blowing each other up will be the best thing to do during this time of the year. There is one particular map in Unreal Tournament which is played in space jumping around three huge buildings – it is a nice venue for some suicide attempts too.

4. Have a visit to the cemetery: Nothing matches a visit to the cemetery, and the best adviced time will be between midnight and three in the morning, as the witching hour can prove to be the most effective thing on this Valentine’s Day. I would also recommend staying there from the day before February Fourteenth if the day before that is a Friday. This way, you can enjoy both Friday the Thirteenth and the Valentine’s Day together, and it will be an even better experience. You should take special care in listening to what the souls as well as the corpses which can animate have to say to you regarding your relationship – they have the right to opinion too.

5. Use an Ouija board to celebrate the day: This can be crucial in going through the day, which is loved by some, detested by some others and not cared about by the rest of the world. Talking with the people from the other world will help you to come up with interesting conclusions about your present relationships. If possible, call out for Mr. Mephistopheles – he is a skilled man in this, and he might even be able to present you with a special contract which can unite your souls forever in hell; it will make sure that the demons will live happily ever after even though I am not sure about your case. But if you ever meet him, you have to promise me that you will ask him about Doctor Faustus.

ouija

These are my favourite five, and I will add four more, making the points nine in number.

6. What to do with Valentine’s Day Cards: Get a card and feed it to fire, and declare that your love is not slave to such meaningless days, when love is forever and not restricted to just one day; for we don’t celebrate with the world but between us.

7. And then with Valentine’s Day Gifts: The next step is to avoid them completely and let the world know that such fake gifts have no place in our life which is not determined by all that is fake and glorified for no reason.

8. And about people tagging us in their photos: We get tagged on Facebook during all the nonsense every year, and now we have to suffer for this meaningless day too – lets think about removing a few such people from friends lists.

9. And escape from the romantic song and movie overdose on television channels: Once again, this is the kind of reminder that nobody needs; the rescue operation here should include cutting the cables as soon as possible.

Happy Valentine’s Day 🙂 😀

***The images used in this blog post are from the Official Facebook Pages of the movies, My Bloody Valentine 3D and Ouija.

This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda.

TeNy