Simona Times: Edition V

***Just some more fictional kitty news centered on our most loved cat of all time, Simona; as she wanders through the complicated world of humans.

Catmobile is birthright, says Simona.
After watching too many Batman movies, Simona has expressed more desire for the Catmobile which has been under the consideration of both the humans and the vampires for quite a long time. If a bat can have a mobile and it even has wheels an armour, why can’t a cat? – this has been her doubt for quite a long time. She once again made it clear that the cats are the true saviours and helpers of the humans and if they can’t have a mobile, it is a shame and something worth lamenting for a very long time. She has also shown the map of her new Catcave on the banks of the river Periyar.

Latest photo of cat-mouse love published.
During the last holiday special speech, Simona had earlier talked a lot about on-going tolerance between cats and mice. Nobody used to believe her, but this photo explains a lot about what she had said. Simona has always been the one cat of truth and justice, and with this photo of her resting with a mouse, she not only proves her greatness of soul and heart, but also shuts up the mouths of her critics. Cats and mice can co-exist, and Simona often finds her very close to this particular mouse. She has even made it clear that she is ready to share her food with her favourite mouse.

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Simona asks for social media representation.
With all the talks about other animals trending in the social media, Simona asks the humans, why not the cats? “There are dogs, cows, bulls, buffalloes; then why not us?” Simona was heard talking about the situation. “We are so cute that due to our presence even Death returned to the other world deciding not to take human lives. We are the reason why so many humans are still alive. We should be trending in Twitter and Facebook” she added. “The problem is that we never boast about what we do for humans, unlike those dogs; we consider what we do as our duty” another cat was heard saying.

Simona known to make secret travel plans.
The Cat Neighbourhood has found certain secret plans which are believed to belong to Simona. This was discovered at a time when all the cats were supposed to stay in the neighbourhood to battle the stray dog menace, and if possible even save those humans who provide food by directing the dogs to those houses which don’t feed the cats. Meanwhile, Simona was found to have watched the movie Rani Padmini, and had planned something special for her empowerment. What the Cat Neighbourhood had discovered was just a small part of a big plan, as it is believed.

Simona likes to move it and move it.
Simona was practicing certain dance steps. She has successfully made a lot of cats in the neighbourhood jealous and they came up with a notice towards the International Cat Committee to prohibit the same in the name of ancient cat culture. They have also come up with posters all around about how significant a role the cats played in Egypt, and this honour as well as dignity were lost to them because some strange cats are intentionally trying to bring shame by doing dancing and singing. The International Cat Committee has banned Simona from dancing “intentionally”, and now she dances while sleeping.

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Selfie with Simona becomes the new trend.
Simona’s popularity has been on the increase, because of which there has been a new trend of taking selfies with her. Simona has been against selfies throughout her life-time, but she has decided to take part in the process because a lot of cats as well as humans have asked for the same. She has exited the anti-selfie group and unliked the anti-selfie page on Facebook to prepare for this. She has also accepted the invitation to the great selfie party next week which is to come after the Halloween party. Simona has also ordered for a special hat to pose for the special selfies.

Simona chooses to seek the truth.
The last few days had Simona and a small team of cats watching the politicians who had come to houses seeking votes. The cats have decided to make sure that none of the humans in the houses which feed the cats be made fools by false promises. A secure network of cats has been established for the same purpose, and with each visit by these politicians, the cats have decided to warn their favourite people with a special kind of meow. There are special squads for each ward of the muncipality, all of them reporting to the meeting to be held at a central point a few days before the day of voting.

***The images used in this blog post were taken by me on Samsung Galaxy A5 and Asus Zenfone 5.

TeNy

Before Simona: Rewind

Simona the Kitty who has grown up to be Simona the Little Big Cat has had the longest stay here and has remained the longest non-movie inspiration for this blog. But there was a time before Simona when there were other cats who became short time inspirations. I have mentioned a few of them before, but I will talk about them in detail here. This post is actually supported by Simona, and there is no cat jealousy involved here – Simona knows none of the deadly sins and she is very much interested in appreciation of other cats.

Simona’s direct predecessor was Zeezee, the local kitten who went missing. She was of almost Simona’s age as of now when she was gone. She wasn’t really that much of a lover of humans, and never allowed anyone to get at the touching distance, while Simona didn’t mind the hand shakes, leg shakes or even head shakes. She was still a fine hunter of spiders, lizards and cockroaches. She loved Tiger biscuits in milk, and sitting on the Honda Dio was a clear priority. [Hometown: Perumbavoor]

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The Badminton Kitty was a well known figure all around the flat. This one was a lover of Badminton and was always there when a game was happening on the court. Whenever the shuttle sailed away from the humans, this one was ready to pounce and check for the quality. The kitty also made sure to pretend to be the official ball boy by running across between the points – may be this one wanted to have a game, but never really managed to the big cat as a car took its life. [Hometown: Aluva/Alwaye]

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The Great Cat of the Ancestral Lands was not that great, even though it was there whenever I visited the place – until some years ago. This one used to have only one priority, which was food, and sometimes even chased hens for no reason. It is not found any more, and the sad thing is that there has been no replacement even after these many years. May be there is no land for cats there? After all, the dogs are the ones who have most of the fun. Simona should complain to her big cat brothers. [Hometown: Kothamangalam]

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This Black Cat is the kind of cat that everybody should have. I have always preferred the black cats because the vampire team got special love for them. Well, this one was very much loved by the kids of the flat, and as they were sad about the demise of the white kitten of the Badminton earlier, they treated this one with a lot of milk every day. But this one suffered the same fate as the Badminton Kitty and jumped in front of a car to end the last of its nine lives. [Hometown: Aluva/Alwaye]

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The Mall Kitty was one of its kind. We haven’t known it for long, but this one was a real entertainer. We did wonder how long it will last considering the traffic around that junction, but the Mall Kitty was wandering around the Lulu Mall finding the food and also jumping around, as if coming right out of circus. This one followed many people, came back to the original place, thought for a few seconds, put its head inside somewhere and returned to its original position. [Hometown: Edappally]

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Among the cats before Simona, there are two who have been there for more time combined. It is the mother and son team which has been the champions of my cat world for a very long time. They belong to the Muvattupuzha area at the home of my aunty. They have been the first case of entertaining cats for me, and you need to check the eyes of the smaller one – he is a big cat now, but his eyes are special; of different colours. The mother cat is no more, but the son is still there, to be the awesome odd-eyed cat. [Hometown: Muvattupuzha]

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***All photos of cats were taken by me only.

Happy Independence Day! 🙂

TeNy

Simona Times: Kochi Edition

I hereby present the first edition of Simona Times, the first full kitten newspaper from Central Kerala. There has been a great protest among the cat community as they have felt that the cats are being avoided and people are just loving the dogs. They have made it clear that it is disappointing that some dogs even have a better status than humans. It is against this discrimination, that the self-proclaimed leader of the Kerala Cat Community, Simona came up with a petition in which she got the finger prints of all cats of Kerala without any discrimination on the basis of gender, colour and meow dialects.

The number of protests has only been increasing these days, and unless justice is served, the cats hope to take to the next level. Another indirect result of these cat movements and revolutions is the publication of Simona Times. Simona works as the reporter and editor of the newspaper with special support from two unknown cats about whom no information is provided. Each and every day and night, Simona goes out for four hours to collect information about the lives of the cats around. International Cat Community has allocated special fund and appreciation for the same.

Full News:

Control the dog lovers, Simona tells the common man.
For the last few days, dog lovers have been racially abusing Keralites for no reason while using lies, and related to the same, Simona has declared full support to Kerala’s common man. She has demanded prison for those stray dogs which have been chasing the little kittens, and has offered her help in identifying the worst among them who have hurt human children. She also talks about a few animal lovers who have asked the common men to get rid of cats and get dogs instead. She adds that these dog lovers who show so much hate should not be allowed to affect the decisions of the common man.

Simona denies the existence of her viral childhood photo.
A photo when Simona was a little kitten has been spreading rapidly through the internet. People have been talking about how cute she was, and that there is no better looking little kitten and a lot of them have shared it on their Facebook, Google Plus and Tumblr profiles. But Simona has completely denied that she ever looked like that. She has declared that she has always been a big, strong cat. She often tell the stories about how she has scared the dogs of the neighbourhood with a special form of cat martial arts, which she calls Simonatica Meowzikia.

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The old photo of Simona the Kitty which she denies to be of her.

Cats ask to be declared as a subdivision of vampire species.
With dogs getting all the special reservation status here, many cat communities have been asking for a separate status. As most of the humans are going for dogs, cats are looking to join the vampire subdivision so that they will be better appreciated as part of the group better. Vampires are known to love cats more, and with wolves replacing the dogs in vampire territory, cats have more opportunities serving the undead world. Some of the cats are already working as a connection between this world and the other, and the cats are hoping to make it official.

Humans preparing fish at home to be rewarded by local cat committees.
This news had spread very fast, and a lot of jealous dogs had protested against the same. As humans have been eating less fish and are deviating towards having chicken, mutton, beef and duck, the organization of local cat committees have asked humans to choose fish instead and be rewarded. The committee has offered free mouse search at each and every house which has fish at least once a week. Some of the bigger cats have even offered protection against the snakes. More fish means more service, and there are new advertisements being set up related to the same.

Cat revolutionaries ask for security posts in guarding zapota and guava.
The Cat Revolutionary Movement has recently gained a lot of supporters among the common cat community. It has actually become so popular that even the breeds from outside have asked for a special membership status. Their most recent demand is for jobs. As dogs have been ineffective in guarding zapota and guava from the bats, the cat revolutionaries have offered humans their service in return for fish. Simona has declared that cats are the only true hunters who can save humans and their property from the dangerous flying creatures in return for just fish and nothing else.


A video of Simona and a bat above proving her skills.

TeNy

Zeezee the Oracle

If you have time, please stop by to say hi and accept the love from the Oracle and High Priestess of the Tea World, known to most of the mortals as Zeezee, and in the immortal world as simply the Oracle Cat. There are not many things that she doesn’t know about, as I can remember her being omnipresent throughout our house and also knowing where we and the food happens to be at any point. She is indirectly related to the Egyptian cat goddess of war, Bastet.

Getting back to the mortal language, this is a cat which was born in one of the corners of our house before we moved there. It was always there, and we did see it more often than we would have expected it to, as it is known to make its presence felt. It is still more of a wanderer though, visiting many houses in the locality, and making sure that most of the humans get a glimpse of its face and hear its meow thing. It is grown up, but not quite as big as the average cat.

An older photo of Zeezee when she was mostly hostile

An older photo of Zeezee when she was mostly hostile

It is only after a few months being gone since we came to live here, that we noticed that it makes more noise than our television, and that it really wanted to get some attention and for sure, some food. Most of the time it just wandered around the gate making the usual noises as it was scared of the vehicles that pass through the road. It detects the sound of a car or bike from a distance and runs away very early. It was one of those days when it was running away.

Tiger biscuits and milk for the little tigress :)

Tiger biscuits and milk for the little tigress 🙂

So we decided to introduce ourselves to the stranger and put some milk on a plate and put it in front of our car. It was hesitant at first, but as soon as we were distant enough, it pounced and finished even the last drop. Then it went under the car and made it the new home, something which we realized the next day. Beneath the Chevrolet Beat was the new resting place for the cat, and even as it often jumps around and sits on the two-wheelers, beneath the car was the one safe place.

One of the many resting places of Zeezee ;)

One of the many resting places of Zeezee 😉

The demands have been rising ever since. It has been in more need as it now comes closer to us even as this cat never lets us touch it, and now it has Tiger biscuits with milk daily – seemingly proving that it belongs to the tiger family indeed. Well, it does have a few stripes. Its latest home is our old television stand which we use as the newspaper desk at the sit-out area. With some old clothes lying there, the place now serves as the official cat bed, a royal resting place.

"Trust me, it is going to rain - take the car" says the Oracle :D

“Trust me, it is going to rain – take the car” says the Oracle 😀

The problem is that we are basically vegetarian, and unless guests arrive, we don’t buy non-vegetarian. But we manage to get some bones from somewhere, and are always looking for some left-overs to feed the cat. It quickly responds to the sound “C” or “Zee”, and therefore we decided to call her Zeezee. Nowadays, it is less scared of us as it wanders around inside the house and gets out to rest at its favourite places. It is now part of home.

We are trying our luck at growing some fruits and vegetables – it is indeed a good feeling, but there is nothing like having a cat. I haven’t actually felt that any other creature can be as cute and as admirable as a cat, and I am glad that I finally got one without much trouble. Nowadays, Zeezee spends her time hunting spiders, cockroaches and lizards, saving the house from such intruders. I do hope that I can have a little black kitten too and name her Agniezska Radwanska 😀 Looking forward to that day 😉

*All photos taken by me using my Samsung Galaxy Duos.

TeNy