The Righteous Negative

There are only a few things about which we can be negative and still be happy about it. The belief in true love should also be something that brings as much doubt in our minds as in the case of a corruption-free government. But among those things about which I can be righteously negative, there is alcohol, there is the cigarette and among them, a different one should be pre-marital sex. This is also a question that is derived from A Passionaate Gospel of True Love : A Mystical True Love Story by Poonaam Uppal – a simple yes or no about pre-marital sex, and with so much ease, I choose no, and it is the righteous negative, for which I shall only preach what I practice.

For going further deep into the same, one has to think about what love really is. If it involves infatuation for the body and the lust which is uncontrollable before getting married, can it be true love? I wouldn’t think so. Infatuation comes and goes, and so does lust – neither of them stay. They are just parasites that feed on the love which is supposed to be eternal and makes it a lesser emotion, creating an effect which can be connected to Satan and the fall of Man. The pre-marital sex is the snake that causes the fall of true love, from its Garden of Eden, as romance becomes something of lesser quality, without anything heavenly in nature.

Om Shanthi Oshana: A movie depicting true love and nothing otherwise.

Om Shanthi Oshana: A movie depicting true love and nothing otherwise.

What kind of true love is based on sex and not the intellectual and spiritual unity? Then, what is the assurance that the partners can remain true to each other in the lack of sexual interest in the future? Time walks around with a sickle – it takes down the beauty and the sexual attachment in the blink of an eye. Well, love should have its pillars on one’s character, and then on the thoughts which are shared. It is not something which can be grown by sex; it should have its roots on understanding and mutual concern. Here is something that should go completely against the romantic comedies of Hollywood, but it is where I stand.

A relation based mostly on sex won’t stand, as it is not something that your partner can always offer, and might be something that another person can offer more. Pre-marital sex is one step that gets one interested in future infidelity – extramarital sex can follow. What needs to precede marriage is a case of honour and respect to each other, and a romance which hasn’t lost at least some of its innocence. If the pillar is of pre-marital sex, it is more like being made of the corpse that your relationship will be in the future.

Thattathin Marayathu: Another movie depicting true love and keeps it unblemished.

Thattathin Marayathu: Another movie depicting true love and keeps it unblemished.

This is one thing for which I completely agree with the comments of some of the BJP and RSS members. At least some people have the guts to talk against such things which have jumped into our culture from outside. It will be one more reason for BJP to get stronger in Kerala too. The protest from some Hindutva organizations against Valentine’s Day is also justified. True love doesn’t need a day unless it wants to dedicate it for sex – for love needs the whole life to love. Pre-marital sex is not what our culture has stood for. It is actually not what any civilized society has stood for. Every religion, with its moral code, has called for truthfulness within wed-lock.

Yes, there is modernization, imitation of Western culture, the need to be cool which comes only with such activities, and so on. It is reaching new heights at a time when the Westerners are imitating India and its spirituality. Western Christianity has gone too liberal and has rather let its culture take over its scripture, but in that case, shouldn’t we follow the Indian culture that we have been familiar with for years? Our culture had an immense amount of goodness and virtue, and can’t we rather embrace it and develop true love? Even William Shakespeare will agree, and so will our great writers.

All these years, I feel that I have been living in a period of transition. I have rarely belonged to the viewpoints of any of the generations of people, and is usually left caught in the abyss of nothingness which goes nowhere. It is the same reason why I have to make clear that I am not against whatever the new generation decides to choose. I have never been making choices for others. It is also because that would make a very old man, and after reaching the twenties, I have hoped not to grow up anymore as it would be more like growing too old.

Poonaam Uppal, a fashion designer and the author of the book.

Poonaam Uppal, a fashion designer and the author of the book.

But you can see that I limit this opinion to myself, and let the rest of the world do whatever it wants. They do have the right to think otherwise and choose. After all, I am a jobless person writing random things in front of a Dell laptop – who am I to advice to the more advanced society? But I take control my life, and choose to say no against pre-marital sex. I don’t see any glorification in indulging in the same. For how I see true love and how much I will value marriage as an extremely valuable thing, I have to choose the option “no”. It remains a question if I get married or get dead and buried before that, but my idea about this will remain the same. You can’t choose to stone me to death for my choice just because your idea is different.

This post is related to the work A Passionaate Gospel of True Love : A Mystical True Love Story written by by Poonaam Uppal, which is supposed to be a journey from the casinos of Las Vegas to the snow clad mountains of the Himalayas, revealing a mysterious love secret from beyond. Once again I thank the author as well as Indiblogger for this opportunity. You can check the book here: A Passionaate Gospel of True Love : A Mystical True Love Story (A Levaanah Publication). Also sharing the author’s website here: http://www.poonaamuppal.com/ – it is where the author’s photo is taken from, and the other two images are from the official facebook pages of the respective movies.

TeNy

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